Reading through today’s gospel, I cannot help but intersperse my internal commentary into the narrative: “But he did not say a word in answer to her.” Silence. “Send her away, for she keeps calling out after us.” Go away. “I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.” No! “It is not right to take the food of the children and throw it to the dogs.” I can’t help you.

I have two degrees in theology and five years of experience teaching it, and still, I do not always understand the Word of God. I certainly do not understand these four rejections.

Similarly, I do not understand when I am denied the things that I ask from God. Are we called to quietly accept God’s will or “bang on the altar,” as the woman did when she persisted for the scraps from the master’s table?

The life-long struggle of the Christian is to conform our will to the will of God.

Every day I strive to understand the will of God through my circumstances. Is it God’s will to have or not have the job I applied for but did not get an offer for? Is it God’s will that I speak to the student who stopped by unannounced after school instead of telling her to make an appointment? Is it not God’s will that my grandmother lived longer, as I wish she had?

There is a constant tension here. If I were the mother in today’s gospel, would I take the four rejections and go away, or would I continue to demand more? Can I genuinely want what God wants, or do I do it quietly, albeit disappointedly, and move on?

Today, let us take the time to ponder these deepest mysteries as we strive to embrace the will of our Father.